Dialogue between Jonas and me, his quiet friend from another world.
Me : Hey Jonas! What's up? You look so different from when I talked to you a few days ago. There is something in your face, what's new.
Jonas: Really?! Mhmm... I don't know. Maybe because I threw my pill away. But maybe you just see emotions, experience and memories for the first time on my face.
Me: You did WHAT? What about your community rules? How did all this happen?
Jonas: I know it's a big change in my life and that it has an effect on my character, but it felt so nice to learn about things like family, happiness, grandparents and...love. At the first time everything was strange and foolish. But now? I just feel a little more complete ... It's hard to be different and have secrets. But in a special,unusal way it makes me proud to have an own life and my own thoughts. Nobody can control my mind, too. This gives a feeling of safety. In spite of this it's a little bit lonely if suddenly nobody can understand you because you're knowing things, they don't know. Sometimes it's hard to take the load of so many secrets. It happens with my Assignment- with my selection. It's my job to be different,now.
Me: And...do you like it?
Jonas: Yes and No. Yes because all the feelings are interesting and refreshing. And an other reason is, that I have no longer this feeling...to wear a mask or to be caged. And a little bit "No" because I felt never before so much separate... And suddenly there is the feeling to show this big world of emotions to them. It's so sad that's a secret...and to tell you the truth: I don't really understand why... I wish I could part for example this indescribable feeling of "love"...
At the first time of my life I get the thought that something goes wrong here...
Me: Well... Your thoghts seem to be dangerous. Good luck. And : Watch out! It can be very hard if you know something, which is actually important for the whole community.
Jonas: I thought about it... I will be careful. Good bye, my friend from elsewhere.